Wednesday, February 15, 2006

The Mailbox Fiasco

Chuck took a break from stripping woodwork to install our mailbox.

Chuck: So how hard can it be to put up a mailbox?  In the grand scheme of home renovation, it was a task I thought I could do with my eyes closed.  Turns out the result looked as if I had.  I get the mailbox, I get the fancy post and I get the required supplemental materials (quickcrete, etc.).  So far, so good.  I figure it's easier to attach the mailbox to the post first, then sink it into the earth, so I set up in the rear bedroom to do the deed.  After inspecting the post, it seems as if it were manufactured incorrectly as the mailbox did not slip down onto the post base.  The rear of the base was not scored all the way, so the box sat up a couple of inches in the back.  Not acceptable. 

Emilie inserts: I was in the bathroom stripping (not as it sounds) and Chuck came out of the bedroom looking a little wild eyed and said he needed some privacy. I asked why, he said he was about to start cursing. Turned on his heel and went back into the bedroom.

Chuck: So, feeling like it would be easier to modify the box rather than go back to the Home D to exchange the post, I get some pliers and started bending the crap out of the rear of the box so it would sit flush.  Great.  Once I bend it like Beckham, I put the box on and realize there is a substantial gap between the mailbox sides and the post base.  Almost as if the post or box had been...manufactured incorrectly.  Emilie comes by and asks how it's going and I simply shut the door and tell her that it's very dangerous work I'm doing.  Safety first.  After wrestling with the setup and my male ego, I emerge and tell Emilie that we need to go look at some other mailboxes in the neighborhood.  Turns out I need an EXTRA piece of wood to serve as the box base that attaches to the post!  Sure would be helpful if they sold something like that or indicated that you needed one. 


Chuck: So I find a scrap piece of wood, carefully measure it so that it sits flush under the box and screw it in to the post!  Victory!  I borrow a post hole digger (my favorite lawn implement):

I dig my hole and throw the sucker in there.  The concrete is poured and the mailbox is in and I'm feeling so satisfied with my skills that I go home and drink a beer and wait for the mailman to come by and start filling our new box with good news.  The next day, Emilie goes to check the mail and the freakin door won't open more than an inch. 

It's almost as if the box base had been... manufactured incorrectly.  Turns out I made the base the same size as the box, thus preventing the door from opening cleanly. 

An easy fix, I pop off the box, cut the base back an inch and throw the box back on.  Success at last.  As it happens, the only thing manufactured incorrectly in this fiasco was me.

Emilie: Not so:)


At 5:39 AM, Anonymous Mary said...

That is one beautiful mailbox, Chuck, and I enjoyed so much how it came to be. I am still guffawing over all the posts and hope future projects are hassle-free.

At 12:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am a little disappointed
....with all your expertise.....You didn't get the mailbox with the billboard on the side that reads:

No Bills Allowed!


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